Keep your volume down when watching porn!!!

[AbsoluteValue]

James Van Iveren, who lives with his mother, says he took matters into his own hands because he didn't have a phone to call police.

 

OCONOMOWOC, Wisconsin (AP) -- A man says he broke into an apartment with a cavalry sword because he thought he heard a woman being raped, but the sound actually was from a pornographic movie his upstairs neighbor was watching.

 

"Now I feel stupid," said James Van Iveren, who has been charged in the case. "This really is nothing, nothing but a mistake."

 

According to a criminal complaint, the neighbor told police that Van Iveren pounded on the door and kicked it open without warning February 12, damaging the frame and lock.

 

"Where is she?" Van Iveren demanded, thrusting the sword at the neighbor, the complaint said. "Where is she?"

 

The neighbor told police Van Iveren became increasingly aggressive as he repeated the question, insisting that he had heard a woman being raped. The complaint said that, with the sword pointed at him, the neighbor led Van Iveren throughout the apartment, opening closet doors to prove he was alone.

 

The neighbor later played for police the part of the DVD he believed Van Iveren heard downstairs.

 

Van Iveren, 39, of Oconomowoc, was charged with criminal trespass, criminal damage and disorderly conduct, all while using a dangerous weapon, and is scheduled to appear in court March 5. Together, the misdemeanor counts carry a maximum sentence of 33 months in jail.

 

Van Iveren said Tuesday that he heard a woman "screaming for help," grabbed the sword, bounded up the stairs, kicked in the apartment door and confronted the man who lived there.

 

"I intended to hold it behind my back and knock. But I froze and instead, what happened happened," he told the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel.

 

Contesting his neighbor's account, Van Iveren said he didn't look anywhere in the apartment except the front room, and that he never threatened the neighbor with the sword.

 

"I had the sword extended, but that was all," he said.

 

Van Iveren, who lives with his mother in the downstairs apartment, said he did not call police when he heard the noises because he does not have a telephone. He said he barely knew the upstairs tenant.

 

Police seized Van Iveren's sword, which he said was a family heirloom.

 

http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/02/22/porn.sword.ap/index.html

 

This has to be one of the funniest news stories I've read in a long time. Could you imagine this happening to you? LOL!

[Dr Awesome]

this is indeed lol; I don't blame the guy tbh and i don't think he should be charged really either - nobody would have given a shit if he had a sword and managed to rescue somebody from getting raped.

 

that said; who the fuck plays porn loud enough so that you're neighbours can here it and think its a scream of help? $2 says it was some freaky shit too, "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHG STOP NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" etc sounds somewhat different from the "OH GOD YES; YES YES YES" and other auditory melodrama that porn stars are so keen on.

[Known One]

I give this a big lol

 

good on him