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The Erotica Parade


kritical
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Bah i came i waited i saw....

 

 

may i just say, i came close to something extra distrubing however:

 

I was right up the top of queens infront of starbucks by Borders there.

we were waiting for this shit to go down when a family of 3 walk across to the middle of the road directly opposite us and stand in there. nothing wrong with that i say to my self: then i start looking...

 

first thing i notice is that the "father" is older looking - kinda hippie dressed and in his 60's or somthing. standing next to him is this younger woman (im GEUSSING around 17-21 age) first thing i see is her head (as there were people in the way), quite pretty: dark colored hair with blond on top. nice face etc. then the person infront of me steps away to reveal her in all her glory.

I notice that she is very clingy to her "mum" and "dad", then i realise what she is wearing: shin lenght fur booties, tiny miniskirt (camo) and a tiny top/singlet/armless thing with no bra on.

 

My mate makes a comment as to what family would let there daughter dress like that and then take her out into the public

 

She is at this stage happly chatting along with her dad" whilst holding on to her mums and dads jackets (im assuiming beacuse she was cold) although it is clear that she is has very little in the way of inibitions from her body language/tone/actions.

 

then the real shocker.

she turns to the side to reveal a Hidieous pot belly

eww gross: apprently i didnt notice it face on.

its also at this stage that i realise her black top is mostly see through.

on closer inspection i then notice that she has the most un-attractive knees ive ever seen (real "manly" ones if you catch my drift) on a woman.

 

as the time passes on i forget about her as mark ellis runs past and the other protesters (somthign about the 90 day bill) show up.

 

then by chance i look back

she is standing there holding onto her "dad" getting quite firsiky:

fist she starts shakeing her breasts (quite large ones too) at teh cars that come past.

then her "dad" gives her a hand with this... then he starts to knock off the strap holding on her top above her sholder and pull it back up

she seems quite keen for all this mind you.

by now the other people I am with start to make various comments that i *THINK* she heard

 

again i get sidetracked for a few more min waiting for these boobs on bikes.

 

next thing i notice is that starts to filrt with passing people and cars by pretending to show her tits, whilst her panrents do nothing (we decided they WERE her parnets)

 

then she catchs me stareing at me and drops a doosey:

she flashes me

it was a somewhat "wtfbbqputthataway" moment as my freinds and i all stare shocked. her parents laugh and do nothing. imeadatly after she bends down to pull up her bootie again and she brings her foot/leg up. we all got our second supprise as we notice that she isnt waring anything under her mini skirt.

 

then the prade goes past and we all go mental with camera phones (wee 5mins of fottage)

 

by now ive seen plenty of other things and since my classes are finished i head home via the bus

 

OMG geuss who got on straigt after me

just her. no parents

now this birkenhead bus had about 5 people on it when i got on and i made my way to the back seat of the bus that was empty.

 

She sat down RIGHT next to me

pot belly and all

 

all i could do was sit there traped

luckly i had some of Ed Rush and Optical's Essential mix (mmm techstep) to keep me sane via ipod + sony headphones but i came close to tapping her on her sholder and saying "you are ugly retarded and fat, go away".

she got off one stop before me

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Bah i came i waited i saw....

 

 

may i just say, i came close to something extra distrubing however:

 

I was right up the top of queens infront of starbucks by Borders there.

we were waiting for this shit to go down when a family of 3 walk across to the middle of the road directly opposite us and stand in there. nothing wrong with that i say to my self: then i start looking...

 

first thing i notice is that the "father" is older looking - kinda hippie dressed and in his 60's or somthing. standing next to him is this younger woman (im GEUSSING around 17-21 age) first thing i see is her head (as there were people in the way), quite pretty: dark colored hair with blond on top. nice face etc. then the person infront of me steps away to reveal her in all her glory.

I notice that she is very clingy to her "mum" and "dad", then i realise what she is wearing: shin lenght fur booties, tiny miniskirt (camo) and a tiny top/singlet/armless thing with no bra on.

 

My mate makes a comment as to what family would let there daughter dress like that and then take her out into the public

 

She is at this stage happly chatting along with her dad" whilst holding on to her mums and dads jackets (im assuiming beacuse she was cold) although it is clear that she is has very little in the way of inibitions from her body language/tone/actions.

 

then the real shocker.

she turns to the side to reveal a Hidieous pot belly

eww gross: apprently i didnt notice it face on.

its also at this stage that i realise her black top is mostly see through.

on closer inspection i then notice that she has the most un-attractive knees ive ever seen (real "manly" ones if you catch my drift) on a woman.

 

as the time passes on i forget about her as mark ellis runs past and the other protesters (somthign about the 90 day bill) show up.

 

then by chance i look back

she is standing there holding onto her "dad" getting quite firsiky:

fist she starts shakeing her breasts (quite large ones too) at teh cars that come past.

then her "dad" gives her a hand with this... then he starts to knock off the strap holding on her top above her sholder and pull it back up

she seems quite keen for all this mind you.

by now the other people I am with start to make various comments that i *THINK* she heard

 

again i get sidetracked for a few more min waiting for these boobs on bikes.

 

next thing i notice is that starts to filrt with passing people and cars by pretending to show her tits, whilst her panrents do nothing (we decided they WERE her parnets)

 

then she catchs me stareing at me and drops a doosey:

she flashes me

it was a somewhat "wtfbbqputthataway" moment as my freinds and i all stare shocked. her parents laugh and do nothing. imeadatly after she bends down to pull up her bootie again and she brings her foot/leg up. we all got our second supprise as we notice that she isnt waring anything under her mini skirt.

 

then the prade goes past and we all go mental with camera phones (wee 5mins of fottage)

 

by now ive seen plenty of other things and since my classes are finished i head home via the bus

 

OMG geuss who got on straigt after me

just her. no parents

now this birkenhead bus had about 5 people on it when i got on and i made my way to the back seat of the bus that was empty.

 

She sat down RIGHT next to me

pot belly and all

 

all i could do was sit there traped

luckly i had some of Ed Rush and Optical's Essential mix (mmm techstep) to keep me sane via ipod + sony headphones but i came close to tapping her on her sholder and saying "you are ugly retarded and fat, go away".

she got off one stop before me

 

You made out with her on the bus didn't you.

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hahah that's distrubing, I'm guessing you weren't looking to join her for some extracurricular activites then?

 

today has been very sureal indeed

 

all the women in the office have done nothing but talk about the all the different boobs they saw today, mainly complaining about the sizes and the outfits they're wearing etc etc... (although I think there's a reason why they're in the parade and ladies at my work aren't)

 

a lot of us went down and several with cameras.. so the pics have been floating around the office..

 

my team leader didn't even notice that I was gone for over an hour I guess he was too busy checking those important emails..

 

Anyway it's over now.. I'd just like to give special mention to the brilliant people at the Auckland City Council for approving such an event.

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Dude, you just made my day. I thought I was under stress with deadlines at work, but sitting next to Slutty-Potter on the bus only minutes after she has flashed you is by far more nerve-wracking. You can't help but run through the almost certainly inevitable conversation in your mind in some pitiful attempt to prepare yourself for it.

 

Potter: "Hey, I saw you at the parade, and I'm pretty sure you saw me"

 

Dude: "BACK UP YOU HIDEOUS FREAK, I'M NOT IN THE MOOD FOR CATCHING WHATEVER DISEASES YOU AND YOUR PARENTS HAVE COOKED UP IN THE BASEMENT THROUGH (YEARS OF?) INCESTUAL BEHAVIOUR AND WHAT I IMAGINE TO BE A MORE THAN A SLIGHTLY QUESTIONABLE SEXUAL HISTORY".

 

Run's up to driver, yells at him to stop the bus leaps off and runs down the road screaming at the top of his lungs

 

Dude (In his head): Nice one mate, dodged a bullet there, AND I managed to do it without causing a scene..Who da man

 

 

[/i]

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You made out with her on the bus didn't you.

 

Negative.

 

I just heard from some of my friends that she took her top right off during the parade. there is also some dispute as to the fact that she may have been pregnat due to the uniqueness of her bulge but i dissagree.

 

on the subject of makeing out with her on the bus: IDK but i think she had the hots for me or somthing :S considering the way she stroked her hair on the bus etc :S

 

i still cant make up my mind on the issue as she could have been hot if she had liposuction or went ot the gym. also from my impression she prolly sleeps around a bit if you catch my drift. i *maby* would have tapped if she put a paper bag over her knees and around her waist AND i was realy drunk.

 

whats more she smelt of perfume realy strongly and made me feel lightheaded/sick

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my team leader didn't even notice that I was gone for over an hour I guess he was too busy checking those important emails...

 

dude.. he wasnt even in the office! he was probably having a masty in one of the bushes down on q street with you!

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((sitting here holding back the various dark and twisted scenarios that my mind is coming up with in relation to the almighty dr's fantastic tale, remembering that I am a father and a peer, and attempting to retain some kind of dignity,,,, its very diffacult for me,,, VERY DIFFACULT))

 

(disclaimer: wen the 9 gets raw better lay on the floor protect your soul, after im finished u wont have it no more...)

 

two words

 

HATE FUCK

 

perfect oppertunity

 

there I sed it

ok im finished...

Discalimer 2:

Im sorry to all the young ladies and young gentlemen I just offended..if I did.. be be thankful,, there was more too that, so visual , succint and hyper real you would have been disturbed for weeks .

 

 

slinks off (again)

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I've seen these type of girls before, or what i consider "double bag" girls. if you get my drift.

 

color me a retard but not realy...

 

Think of it like this:

 

When I go to foodtown, if the slacker tries to pack like 3 bottles of coke or whatever into one bag, I'll ask that they 'double bag' it so if the first one is the break, my important liquids wont escape and leave me vulnerable to the outside worlds exposure.

 

I use the same thing when I'm talking about rooting hoes. but obviously in this context, bag refers to condoms

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then i realise what she is wearing: shin lenght fur booties, tiny miniskirt (camo) and a tiny top/singlet/armless thing with no bra on.

 

This wouldn't happen to be the slapper in question, would it?

 

 

OMG! yes thats her...

 

see what i mean...

 

 

oh yeah and on that double bag thing: i thought you ment somthing like needing two papaer bags over her face before you would "tap" her (bag'n'tap)...

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